r3d1sth3b3stcolor:

falcon-knight:

ok STORYTIME

my mom gave me this gift for my birthday

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at first i was like

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please don’t tell me it’s a sex toy

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but then i was like

oh it’s a necklace in which you can put a special pearl

and i-

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make a wish?

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i think i just became a magical girl.

coolest fucking gift ever

(Source: makotroytachibolton, via kianlawley)

undercover-magi:

dinosaurs-on-wheels:

meladoodle:

*walks up to newborn baby* haha fuckin virgin

idk man it was inside a vagina more recently than you were

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(via kianlawley)

miscaitlin:

if my future husband doesn’t propose to me like how Kayne west did than I give up

(via kianlawley)

*takes 19 selfies*

*deletes 22 selfies*

(Source: k999, via kianlawley)